A viola player's idea of classical music appreciation: Turning it off.
What is the longest viola joke? Harold in Italy.
A viola player went to a piano recital. After the performance he said 'I particularly liked that piece you played last—the one that started with a long trill.' The pianist said 'I didn't play any pieces that started with trills.' The viola player hummed the opening bars of Für Elise.
What's the most popular recording of the William Walton viola concerto? Music Minus One.
Why did Mozart hate violas? Have you heard them?
Bach wrote violas into his music to give tired listeners a nap break.
Why didn't Vivaldi write more viola concertos? He ran out of erasers.
Haydn hid the violas in his symphony. The audience thanked him.
Wagner said the viola was essential. The viola misunderstood and went home.
Brahms loved violas. That's why his music is so long - he was waiting for them to catch up.
Why is Bartók's viola concerto unfinished? Even he gave up.
Stradivarius made violas too. Nobody cared.
If Mozart came back to life, the first thing he'd say: 'Why are the violas still here?'
Paganini never wrote for viola. Even the devil has standards.
Dvorak included violas in his New World Symphony. America hasn't been the same since.
