Bowing technique for violists: lift the bow off the strings, that's it, now don't put it back on.
How to hold the viola? Put it back in the case, lock it and grab the handle.
How do you get a viola section to play spiccato? Write a whole note with 'solo' above it.
A violist noticed at the end of each rehearsal break, one of the other violists would look at the inside flap of his jacket before sitting down. After several decades, he finally looked inside the jacket. It read: 'viola left hand, bow right.'
How do you get violists to not play something? Label it with 'soli'.
How do you get a violist to play a passage very softly? Mark it 'solo'.
How do you get a violist to play fortissimo? Write 'pp, espressivo'.
How do you make a violin sound like a viola? Play in the low positions and miss every other note.
How do you get the viola section to play divisi? Ask them to play in unison.
